What's with me?

I feel that I'm behaving like a blockhead in school, staring at invisible stuff sometimes.
Also, been plagued by a problem of being too quiet among my class people. I'm beginning to like my class by the day and this feeling is one of the few encouragements that I have to keep going on every day.
Maybe I am just thinking too much of things that shouldn't be thought of much.
In this school, neither my previous enemies or friends in my secondary school are here. All either have gone on to better JCs or poly. Maybe this is for the better, since everyone here is new, but it comes with a heavy price tag. All my best and close friends have gone on to another JC. And there's one new CCA club there which I wanted to join.
Yet by a twist of fate, I came here. Missed 1 point to get in there.
TPJC's facilities are not new, the school started in 1988. And students here complain of the canteen food which is said to be worse than their secondary school's. Which I have to agree somewhat. The CCAs are not very unique or interesting, and I did not want to rejoin my previous CCA, because it has tired me out way too much back in sec school.
However, when I think about all these, I think of MI. Compared to TPJC, it is more shabby (more than a hundred years old), the canteen food is even worse (two canteens stalls only). And most of the CCAs are held in the other Jurong campus, which means long school days for their students.
This makes me appreciate what I have, although I'm still feeling a little upset about why I cannot take a fourth A level subject. Really feel that my first three months grounding in economics is all wasted away.
Yet I consider myself to be lucky that I have more free time than my friends who are taking 4 subjects.
A tarot reading some time ago mentioned that a great sacrifice has to come with success. Is that what it means? I really don't know.